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rds with Friends episodes are bonus episodes where different members of Mama Dragons provide definitions for LGBTQ related topics. This episode includes the following definitions:
Biphobia shared by CC H. in Oklahoma
Bi-Erasure shared by Amy Hutchinsson
Intersectionality shared by Kelly Fay in Essex, England
Romantic Orientation shared by Alex in The Bronx, New York
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JEN: Hello and welcome to In The Den with Mama Dragons. I’m your host, Jen. This podcast was created to walk and talk with you through the journey of raising happy, healthy, and productive LGBTQ humans. Thanks for listening. We’re glad you’re here.
For many parents, learning they have an LGBTQ child also means they have a whole new vocabulary to learn. So we’re here to give you an introduction to potential new vocabulary a few words at a time. These definitions won’t teach you everything there is to know about these new words. But they will give you a foundation upon which to build your future learning. And remember, this is an area where vocabulary is changing rapidly. We invite you to enjoy how our language changes as our understanding grows.
Bi-Erasure shared by Amy Hutchinsson
Bi-erasure is a form of biphobia that ignores the existence of bisexuality. Another phrase that’s sometimes used is bisexual invisibility. In its most extreme presentations, bi-erasure suggests that bisexual people simply don’t exist. And now historically some gay folks have identified as bi- for a period of time while they came to a fuller understanding of themselves. However, extreme bi-erasure posits that anyone who identifies as bisexual is merely confused or in denial. One of the ways I’ve seen bi-erasure revealed is through the conversation therapy narrative. Some people who were previously in same-sex relationships have gone on to form happy, healthy long-term partnerships with people of the opposite sex to whom they are attracted. While such event are portrayed in terms of orientation change or healing, these individuals have likely always been bi-, pan-, or omnisexual. There are also less extreme but still damaging forms of bi-erasure like validating the experiences of bisexual women, while downplaying or outright denying the experiences of bisexual men. And many bisexual individuals may face subtle or direct rejection for not simply “picking a side” identifying themselves as either gay or straight. This struggle for acceptance is found both among the general public and sadly within the LGBTQ+ community.
Biphobia shared by CC H. in Oklahoma
Biphobia is an aversion toward bisexuality or people who are perceived as being bisexual. Similar to homophobia, it refers to hatred and prejudice specifically against those who identify or are perceived as being bisexual. It can take the form of denial that bisexuality is a genuine sexual orientation, or of negative stereotypes about people who are bisexual, such as the beliefs that they are promiscuous or dishonest.
Intersectionality shared by Kelly Fay in Essex, England
The term intersectionality was coined by Kimberlé Crenshaw in 1989, and refers to the connection between race, gender, and other systems that work together to oppress, while also allowing privilege in other areas. Intersectionality looks at how race, gender, and other components "intersect" to shape the experiences of individuals and acknowledges that everyone has their own unique experiences of discrimination and oppression. We need to consider everything and anything that can marginalize people – gender, race, class, sexual orientation, physical ability, etcetera and consider how the intersections of all of these marginalized identities compound in ways that create increased marginalization and oppression.
Romantic Orientation shared by Alex in The Bronx, New York
I grew up in Puerto Rico with the ideas that only male and female were the genders and only gay and straight were the sexualities. And it wasn’t until I was older that I realized this wasn’t the case. And it was because of the Mama Dragons that I learned about it and through other friends. And I’m so grateful for that because I feel like if I can learn these things, I can better help my daughter as well. Romantic orientation refers to an individual’s pattern of romantic attraction regardless of one’s sexual orientation. For individuals who experience sexual attraction, their sexual orientation and romantic orientation are often in alignment, meaning that they experience sexual attraction toward individuals of the same genders or gender as the individuals they are interested in forming romantic relationships with, but that’s not always the case. Sexual orientation and romantic orientation can be unlinked. Someone might experience romantic attraction but not sexual attraction. In understanding identities and attractions, it is important to remember that orientation and attraction do not necessarily define or predict behavior. Examples of romantic orientations are aromantic, biromantic, heteroromantic, homoromantic, polyromantic, panromantic, and demiromantic.
JEN: Thanks for joining us In the Den. If you enjoyed this episode, please tell your friends, and take a minute to leave a positive rating or review wherever you listen. Good reviews make us more visible and help us reach more folks who could benefit from listening. And if you’d like to help Mama Dragons in our mission to support, educate, and empower the parents of LGBTQ children, please donate at mamadragons.org or click the donate link in the show notes. For more information on Mama Dragons and the podcast, you can follow us on Instagram or Facebook or visit our website at mamadragons.org.